What a wonderful 2006.
Work ended at 11 PM.

At the stroke of midnight, coincidentally, “Say Goodbye” by Ashlee Simpson, was playing.

I’m saying goodbye to ‘06, and yet I’m saying WELCOME to the new year.

Happy New Year, Ed.
2007 is going to rock you.

And to all readers, hope you all spent your New Years with the ones you love, and cherish them now and forevermore.

Kisses and spanks,
x0×0 Ed.

“So go out there, flip back through your journal and smile at the happy events that happened, ponder over the sad ones that occured and look forward to making history (and making new mistakes) in 2007!”

– Fitrah’s blog.

So that’s what I’m going to do. Go to my archives and bring back memories from this past/passing year.

6 June 2006
I pretended someone hacked my blog and got all my previous Quotient Rule posts deleted, from last year to June.

23 June 2006
Worst day of my life. Not exaggerating.

25 June 2006
My first date, but it turned sour and we never contacted each other again.

29 June 2006
Shawn Paul looks like Kero. Primero Ang is gone from the competition. I miss you babe, even if you do already have a girlfriend.

5 July 2006
Had a haircut… and was massaged by this guy barber OMG his grip was so strong I loved it. I think I was so high from that… him squeezing my tiny shoulders. But there was bald patch on my head though. Fuck.

9 July 2006
Reflected on my life. I was scared of gays. I remembered I had a smell fetish, smelling the uniforms of boys during/after PE when they were not around.

20 July 2006
My Marketing group sabotaged me, thus ultimately, I got F for that module, which I will have to retake in 2007. A paedophile waited for me to enter the lift late at night, holding the lift open for me, but that sucker. I live at the second floor, I had no reason to take the lift.

24 July 2006
Jayne Yong’s birthday celebration at Siloso Beach!

27 July 2006
Applied for job at Cafe Cartel with Ferooze.

31 July 2006
First day of work at Cartel… that Monday was so eventful.

7 August 2006
Quote

I’m scared to be in a relationship because people might use me for

A. My money
B. My good looks
C. My naivety
D. All of the above.

Ok, so B isn’t that bad la.

8 August 2006
I had the smallest crush on the new girl at work on her first day, Jerlyn.

10 August 2006
Dorothy the so-called “senior manager” drove me nuts.

12 August 2006
CLASS OUTING to Yishun Safra, initially for bowling, but all the lanes were occupied by competitors like team name “Fantastic Four”. LMAO. How cheesy. Then just ate lunch there and watched My Super Ex-Girlfriend with a select few.

ALSO, made friends with Xvan.

13 August 2006
I installed a hit counter to keep track of my visitor traffic.

14 August 2006
My second gay date ever, this time with Xvan. I thought I felt some kind of emotion. =)

22 August 2006
The best module ever, Visual Composition, started. However, the lecturer didn’t remember me from previous module, Creative Thinking.

29 August 2006
I wore makeup: foundation and lipstick, to school. I found out Pluto was no longer a planet.

3 September 2006
CLASS GATHERING: Aloha Bungalow for Azizah’s 17th birthday party.

4 September 2006
Steve Irwin passed away.

8 September 2006
Had a VERY VERY bad HELLISH sore throat, that makes my voice deeper than Jonathan Leong’s. Jerlyn advised me to drink honey lemon.

17 September 2006
Cafe Cartel experienced its first blackout. I was clearing plates in the darkness.

18 September 2006
Got a new Sony Ericcson. =)

23 September 2006
Mediacorp artiste Priscilla Chen ate at Cafe Cartel.. Table 27.. with a guy friend. Sirvin spotted her.

27 September 2006
Quarrelled with Kero

29 September 2006
I tried bowling for the first time. Thus, no longer a bowling virgin.

4 October 2006
Semester results released. I had a freaking low GPA of 1.93. I was so pissed, I wanted to pour hot water over myself.

7 OCTOBER 2006!
MY BIRTHDAY! The haze hit a record high, peaking at 140. Movie under the stars.

15 October 2006
Mommy got me a 6 Megapixel camera. I used it to record a video of me singing Hurt by Christina Aguilera.

18 October 2006
Attended Etiquette class … learnt a lot on my respective field. And easy SEAL points.

20 October 2006
Got my first ear piercing. I am no longer a piercing virgin. Haha.

26 October 2006
Pang seh a mature man for (first time) gay sex, just to accompany Eleazar to take neoprints with her. Thus, no sex. =)

28 October 2006
Slept over at Eleazar’s house. I ogled at her hot (straight) younger brother.

29 October 2006
Sexually abused at work. I loved it.

1 November 2006
Had a short fling with a gay chub. I hate those fat asses. I have way better taste.

3 November 2006
Highlighted my hair for the first time. No longer a dye virgin. AND rekindling with Xvan.

7 November 2006
POLY VISIT to Singapore Biennale

8 November 2006
Went to town to meet my 3rd gay date ever, Gabriel Chua Ming Wei. Unfortunately, he pang seh-ed me. Fortunately, I saw Paul Twohill at Heeren. What a pleasant surprise.

10 November 2006
Worked at Siglap Cartel for 1 day only.

16 November 2006
Swam for the first time this year.

25 November 2006
CLASS OUTING: Sentosa’s Palawan Beach for 4E1 gathering. Such a fun day. I got soooo sunburnt. Chaotar like BBQ!

2 December 2006
Had a date with someone who was already attached! Oh my Lord. I was uninformed.

9 December 2006
Made a new friend, who was passing out flyers. It kills me because I never saw him ever again.

11 December 2006
I thought Kero ate at Tampines Cafe Cartel while I was working.

16 December 2006
I saw Xvan and Fadhil outside the bus that I was on!

19 December 2006
Regretfully, I lost my virginity.

21 December 2006
Xvan introduced me to Kenrick. “KR” captured my heart.

25 December 2006
Camwhored with my boii on Christmas Day at Suntec. Into drunken stupor later. I finally knew how love actually felt like.

2006 was a good year. Thanks for sticking with me all this while, readers. Your… urm, reading means a lot to me. Otherwise, how else my hit counter can rise up to 3,500 +++ visitors since 13 August?

Yesterday, I searched Google for “gay waiter” and “cafe cartel” together, but turns out, none of the results pointed to me because they were archived at 2004, 2005 or early 2006, and I never worked during those days.

*sigh*

I want to make an impression on customers… sigh. I think the reason being I’m too straight acting. Ain’t that just dandy?

I want to shake my ass and customers to point and laugh at me and gossip about me being gay.

Haha. I don’t know. I just bask in gossip. Maybe I’m just an attention seeker, but hey, everyone knows that by now. Otherwise, how do you explain my magnificent blogskin? Haha. But seriously. I need to learn to walk like a gay. So cool la.

I definitely got the limp wrist down. Booyah.

Ok what crap am I talking about.

ROFLMAO.

I watched ChannelNewsAsia yesterday. Did you know…

Out of 150 females, 50 are attracted to chocolates?
Out of 150 males, 21 are attracted to chocolates?

The figure for males isn’t that high. But you can consider me 1 out of the 21 out of the 150. Urgh this reminds me of the A Math Venn diagram things: set, subsets, and shit like that. Unity and intersect. Fuck.
Lol.

Just this morning I had 1 packet of peanut M&Ms.
I think I’m growing fat, because once I get fat, the fat automatically goes towards my neck and cheeks. Gah. That’s why, when posing for my camera, I have to give the illusion of “long neck”, so I don’t look “fat”. Geddit?

Is it just me or does ALMOST every blog post of mine have the word “gay” in it? Gosh. I’m so gay for overusing the word “gay” so much.

I actually surprise myself. As if there’s no synonyms to “gay”. There are plenty, urm, like… faggot, homosexual, urm… sissy?

Not sissy.

Because as everyone knows:

All sissies are gays.
But not all gays are sissies.

Did you know, Joakim Gomez is gay? I’m dead serious here. That Koreandian (that’s supposed to be a portmanteau of Korean and Indian, shut the fuck up la, I know it sounds wrong) is gay.

Oops, I told the whole world.
Now Joakim’s life will come crashing down.

MUAHAHAHAHAHA.

Or will it?

So when the monkey “performs” at Vivo later, be sure to throw lots of Renoma onstage so he gets horny and his big dick can grow and got bulge in his pants and the girls will go wild, totally ignoring the fact that he’s gay and has no place in his heart for women.

You don’t know what’s Renoma?

Obviously your mother does your shopping for you. Haha.

Ed, you’re so bad.

Yes. Really. I dreamt that I puked

To dream that you are vomiting, indicates that you need to reject or discard an aspect of your life that is revolting. There are some emotions or concepts that you need to confront and then let go.

How?

I don’t know where to start.

Possessive

First I laid eyes on the warmth of above
Which then I knew I’ve lost my love
And stars sparkle, like dead flashlights
Replace the batteries, remote delight

The smile and Sun intensely burn
It’s that first glance that they return
And offered up their gift to share
That switched their silence through the air

Kill the moment that lingers the taste
Since half his goods have gone to waste
While the other sits quiet, admiring his stare
He waits as the other takes up the dare

Momentary mix of lies and facts
Double the desire of truth he lacks
Triple the times he confessed his ways
Kill him off before possession plays

Look up above, do you see the soul?
The darkness below has taken control
When the shadows of Past hide the rest
Acknowledge his lover’s been possessed

Copyright 2006 Quotient Rule Original Composition.

Let’s get two girls who are filthy rich. -.-

Today I worked full shift. Really. As busser, nonetheless. Yay. But I swear Chrystabelle and Francis are two people who REALLY don’t help with busser because the place stayed freaking dirty for so damn long.

Sobs.

And I wanted to do host so bad. -.-

Perlin worked today. Woohoo. And I’m so high, thinking that I’m taking Italian for CDS. Gah. French is SOOOOO overrated, right, Fitrah?

During my break, I called Kenrick. HEY. At least I’m trying. If I’m not spending 1 fucking second with him in person, then at least I’ll spend 1 fucking second with him on chatter. And it didn’t last for very long, because he had to go for badminton at 6.

Hmm.

I’ll give him the benefit of a doubt once more.

Then I got interviewed by a Business (MassComm) student in Temasek Poly, wow, random girl coming up at a random time to interview. Actually, she wanted to interview my manager(s) Lisa OR Michelle OR Erene but they were just plain effing shy. Thus, I was interviewed as a CONSUMER instead…. about the fucking GST hike.

I thought GST goes to the old people, but it turns out, as told by my interviewer, that it goes to the poor? Hmm? What did I learn during Social Studies?!
Drama.

Mavis told me I had better taste. But I won’t let go of him no matter what. Maybe I’m just naive or close-one-eye. Maybe. Makes me confused all over again.

Today, there were 2 muscular gays at Table 12. They got the gay face la, everyone could tell.

There was another table, Table 18, that would crack into i’m-about-to-burst-into-laughter-type-of-smiles whenever I refilled their icewater, THUS, I asked Chrystabelle to refill for me. ^^ v

Then today, there was this table that guessed I was a DESIGNER. By my piercing and my hair? Ho ho wtf.

Thus, everyone who wants to be recognized as a designer has to have the SAME piercing as me and the SAME hair as me. Wa, comformist, ah?

I caught my last bus.

Hmm. Nothing interesting to blog about actually.

Urgh, I hate poly life.

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I chose these for my electives.

I’m taking only 2 electives. Here are mine, based on preference.

I’m out of my mind. I agreed to replace Elenda tomorrow morning.

So tomorrow I’m working from 12 PM to 11.30 PM, with 2 hours break from 4 PM to 6 PM (hint), making it 9 and a half hours of work! ON FRIDAY! Faints.

Worked today again la. I thought I was ending at 9, but actually I ended at 11 PM. Wa. I messaged Kenrick about it, just to warn him.

And he was sweet enough to let me know in person, that he couldn’t come, oh the irony. So shocking that he gave me a visit AGAIN. Wa. I was so very sad. Today I spent less than 10 seconds with him. And I’m not exaggerating. My heart is feeling very empty again.

And when he left, I was forcing a fake smile.

Why couldn’t he pick me up?
Reason: He was meeting a “friend.”

This friend is so lucky that Kenrick’s spending more time with him than me. How do I know it’s a ‘him’?

I just do.

I felt so sad. Tears, people, tears, but then I automatically moved on into my stage of numbness. Wee.

Kenrick’s not picking me up forced me to eat my dinner. *hic*

So, life goes on.
Hm.

Mood: =
Sorry, I would blog more, but you’ve caught me at my numb stage, so, meh.

PS: Yesterday, people at work suspected Lewis was gay. 2 days ago, Xvan, Kenrick and Fadhil suspected Lewis might be gay. However, many months ago, I suspected Lewis might be gay.

Today worked night shift from 5 to 10.

Kenrick came again. Yay.

Sorry blog. Some things I want to hide.
Sorry readers. I don’t want Quotient Rule to be a sad story.

Don’t joke lah.

So Feiruz came back to Singapore today, so Azizah, Fitrah and I all went to meet her. Hoorah. Causeway Point and away! I, of course, wanted to get pimple cream for all the most obvious reasons.

Walked around before settling doown at Delifrance for lunch/tea. Like, gaww. I think, now I realise, I sounded like a complete and total bimbo when I said:

~~ “(Wearing sunglasses) is like wearing spectacles with colour.”

Hm.

All to Delifrance where Fitrah was trying very very hard to pronounce the French things in the menu, which sound really wrong, but whatever, it’s as close as she’ll get.

The menu’s in focus.

Feiruz (left) and Azizah. Woe.

Fitrah browsing the menu, which shines light. Look at that. Can you see the Eiffel Tower?

Hm.

Feiruz contemplating her Pot-of-Gold, or whatever her icecream was called.

And there was Indian guy who was like a sissy… hmmm … working there. Yes. Hmm. I have never seen an Indian sissy in my life. Firstly, sissies are rare to come by. Secondly, the Indian population in Singapore is… well… small. So rare multiplied by small equals to 0.0001% chance.

Enough of him.
Even though he has a ring on his ring finger.

To set the record straight, I didn’t eat anything.

So I went to work, 10 minutes late, because of Nabila, but well, oh well, that’s fine. Bus 168 pwns. So I was like quite occupied with clearing tables but suddenly, who do I see eating at Table 11?

Xvan, Fadhil and Kenrick. Aww how sweet right?

I keyed their orders. Woo. But apparently I got them wrong and they didn’t tell me I keyed them all wrong? I tried to avoid them because I’m shy. But everyone at work has different reactions.

Lewis told me that all 3 of them, as quoted by him, are damn gay. I’m like

-.-’

Ok so work was smooth and I finally got to work with Sashikala WOO SCREAMS. She rocks the rocks.

I left work and met up with those 3 at BK? Then buy my tiny dinner of Chickenmushroompie and Cupcorn… and Kenrick has a new wallet. Wahoo na?

Oh I have a pimple.

Went home … somewhat… with Xvan and Fadhil, taking the same bus. Xvan is full of himself can? But so am I, so… what am I saying?

Well, had a MSN conversation with Kenrick and I feel like committing s******. You know, in the shadows, going to the kitchen, slowly grabbing a butcher knife… and one swing and CHOP~!

I am so totally emo.

*emo/evil laughter*

Hmm?

Oh, yes. I’m fine. Everything’s just wonderful. I’m having the time of my life. (Sarcastic or not? You decide.)

I love you in the light, in the dark, I push my suspicions aside because you’re too precious to lose, Kenrick.